Monday, November 28, 2016

Hello again.

Second post.

I've had a lot on my mind lately, like football games (I'm a OSU Beavers fan, by the way).

I'm going to be heading off to college very soon, within a few years, and I spend a lot of time trying to decide which direction to go, what college to attend, what to major in, how to pay ...

So often, I hear from people, "I wish I'd done that differently." My mom left her initial field of study, changing from a piano major to getting an English degree. Sometimes she says she wishes she'd stuck with music, but at the same time, she's glad of all the classes in Shakespeare and other literature that she took, and all the training she got as a writer. Even now, she is both a writer and musician, and one I greatly admire in both respects.

But that deviates from my topic. I'm so afraid of going down the wrong path, afraid that what matters to me now won't be as important in four years, and I get cold feet and abandon my plan. Then I regret it later. For instance, I am not certain even of the route between homeschool and college. Will I be able to pick up any scholarships? I mean, I would like to at least have the option of going to a prestigious conservatory like Oberlin or Julliard.

I worry about this a lot, and too often I put too much stock in my own performance (and in trying to impress people with my ambitions alone). I go through a lot of stress every day, thanks to my trying to live up to my own expectations. Slowly, I can feel myself being worn down to the bone by the unfathomable tasks I've set before myself.

Except that God doesn't want me too think like that.

Jesus said, "Look at the birds of the air, that they do not sow, nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not worth much more than they?" [Matthew 6:26]

Yes, I am. My worth comes from Jesus, and as long as I place my worth in my own performance and the approval others have of my pianistic skills, I will never be satisfied.

And God will provide the way. Recently, I applied for a scholarship through the Youngarts competition (which I'll be hearing back about within a week or two). But I didn't have a lot of time to worry about it beforehand--God showed me the website online just a few days before the deadline. And even more miraculous, I had been working all summer perfecting two pieces that fit perfectly with their requirements.

Whether or I not I win the scholarship is not the point. God has shown me a way, and I believe he will provide for my future, no matter what happens.


For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."--Jeremiah 29:11 

Tuesday, November 22, 2016

Hello Readers,

This is my first blog, ever.


Not really.

I'm going to try to post every few weeks. Whether or not anyone actually reads this ... another matter entirely.

A little about myself:

First and foremost, I am a child of the One True King (thanks, Matthew West!). If I was perfect, I would do everything for the glory of God. Since I am (only) human, I have to try (and often I fail) to actually glorify God in everything I do. Because that's why Christians are still here on earth, so that others may come to know God's love, forgiveness, and power!!!

Second, I am a musician. The piano is my main instrument, and I hope to go on to college as a piano major. And if I make it to competitions from there, well, that's by the grace of God. I'm also kind of a nerd (about everything, but as of right now it's mostly music),  so I may, from time to time, post ramblings about my favorite composer or obscure technical difficulties in a song I'm doing, so bear with me.

Third, I am a writer (obviously). I have finished ONE novel (and I don't really know how good it is right now anyway--I'm kind of at a stuck point in the millionth revision). Recently, I've also started working on poetry. Maybe I'll post a few here.

Fourth, I love to explore, both on my bike and on foot. I like going to strange places, and often my parents are baffled by my accidents that come from taking alternate paths.

Fifth, I just started drama classes at Journey--all those years, I never thought I could be good at drama. But now I really enjoy it. Thank you, Andrew Rice!!!

And last but not least, I love all things strange and exciting in nature. That includes tornadoes, crazy rivers, the ocean ...

I hope you guys enjoy this post and every post after.

"The earth is the Lord's, and everything in it."--Psalm 24:1